Lessons In Stalking: Adjusting to Life With Cats by Dena Harris

Author:Dena Harris
Language: eng
Format: azw3, mobi, epub
ISBN: 9780976846925
Publisher: Spotlight Publishing, Inc
Published: 2005-09-10T00:00:00+00:00

***

Two weeks later I sneak into the house. I’ve just returned from the vet where we take the cat once a month to have her claws trimmed. We did a price comparison and the six dollars we pay the vet tech to do this is much cheaper than the blood transfusions required each time we attempt it ourselves.

I release the cat from her carrier and she scurries off.

I then carefully unwrap the bundle in my arms. It mews softly.

My husband enters the room.

“What’s that?” he asks, suspiciously.

“What?” I ask, looking over my shoulder.

“In your arms,” he says speaking through clenched teeth. “What is that in your arms?”

I gently place the kitten on the floor and fling myself at my husband. I decided on the drive home the pity route was my best shot at victory.

“I was at the vet and I saw this kitten in a cage. A cage!

And she is so cute and I love her and I think she would be a really good pet and the cat needs a friend and I love her and I can’t take her back to that awful cage,” I say, ending on a wail.

“No,” he said.

I grab the kitten and wield her in front of his face, raising my voice to Minnie-Mouse decibels. “Look how cute I am!” I coo, bouncing the kitten. “Look at my widdle face.

Please don’t send me back to the mean, old, ugly cage.”

The kitten sends my husband a look. Sorry man. Listen, is she always like this? Really, that cage wasn’t so bad…

My husband opens his mouth.

“Pleaseeeee” I say, shaking the kitten at him. She’s looking a little dazed.

He rolls his eyes. “Fine, we’ll see how it goes.”

I knew exactly how it would go. Carrying the purring kitten home, I had visions of our two cats as compadres for life. They would bat a ball of yarn back and forth. Snuggle together side by side in front of a warm fire grate. Give each other baths. They would be the best of friends. And they would love me all the more for bringing them together.

The cat was peeking at the kitten from behind the kitchen door.

“Come here sweetie,” I said. “Look what Mommy got for you.” I picked the kitten up and placed her in front of the cat, waiting for the love fest to begin. I was, to say the least, unprepared for what happened next.

The cat’s back rose in a boiling arch of fury as she towered over the kitten, spitting and hissing. Not to be outdone, the kitten arched her back and growled deep in her throat.

“Uh-oh,” said my husband, taking a step back.

There was a flash of claws, flying fur, yelps, growls, and then it was over. The cat ran out of the room and the kitten crawled under the couch where she stayed for the next two weeks. The cat refused to speak to me for a month.

I was miserable.

“They hate me!” I wailed to my husband.

“Yes,” he said.

I glared at him.

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